Resilience, Prosperity, and Purpose: Lessons from Dr. JaNee' Mobley

[00:00:03] You are listening to Resilient Life, the podcast where we explore the power of resiliency.

[00:00:10] I'm Nikita Ross. It is my hope that listening to this podcast will give you the tools to connect

[00:00:17] with and increase your resiliency. So join me on this adventure of self-discovery and self-love.

[00:00:28] Hello Resilientites. Thank you for joining us for another episode of Resilient Life. Are you ready for this week's

[00:00:36] guest? I'm going to start by asking you, do you want to be called doctor? Do you like to be called by

[00:00:42] your first name? Please introduce yourself. Tell us how you love to be addressed. Even if you have

[00:00:47] tooth and light, people I don't know will call me doctor and people I love call me. So you tell us

[00:00:54] how you want to be addressed and tell us a little bit about yourself, anything you feel comfortable

[00:00:57] sharing. And thank you so much for being here. Thank you for having me. I am Dr. JaNee Mobley.

[00:01:04] I'm affectionately known as Dr. JaNee Mobley. And I help women, women in corporate America who know

[00:01:10] that they have a gift to share with the world and teach them how to create a profitable business

[00:01:15] while overcoming mindsets that prevent profit, progress, and prosperity.

[00:01:21] Oh, do it again. Give me those three again. I like that. Progress, prosperity.

[00:01:27] Oh, I love that. And how did you come up with that?

[00:01:29] Well, I'll be totally transparent. When I initially started my business,

[00:01:34] I was one that said what I wanted, but my way of thinking didn't believe what I was saying.

[00:01:43] Right? So I believe somewhere in me, I desired success, but there was something on the inside of

[00:01:50] me, the stories I was telling myself because of experiences and the way that I saw myself at the

[00:01:55] time that I literally convinced myself that it wouldn't happen. And once I develop the mindset,

[00:02:04] I began to shift my mindset and accept that I can have what I desire and I deserve it regardless of

[00:02:10] what I've done. Yes.

[00:02:12] And once I realized that, I said, you know what? I know that one of the main reasons that people do

[00:02:19] not succeed in business is because of the positioning of their thinking and the place of their beliefs.

[00:02:27] So I don't just teach my clients how to build a business. I teach them how to build themselves

[00:02:35] because I know that when you build yourself, oh, building the business will be easier.

[00:02:40] Wow. That is so accurate. I am in a place where I'm learning that I, I have a friend visiting me

[00:02:50] for the week and we were discussing that and we were just this morning saying how we need to go in deep

[00:02:56] and even pick up those unconscious thoughts and beliefs about ourselves as far as like success,

[00:03:02] health, wealth, relationships, all of those, because when we are saying we want these things,

[00:03:08] but they're not manifesting, it's like, okay, what are we truly believing about whether or not we deserve it,

[00:03:16] whether or not we have access to it. So I love that. I love that.

[00:03:21] Thank you.

[00:03:22] That is so great. Tell us how someone would connect with you to start either building their business,

[00:03:28] but it sounds like, because not if we think about it, we always say build your business,

[00:03:32] but not everyone is an entrepreneur. Some people do not have that desire. So it sounds like your

[00:03:38] services are even just hoping people be the best at the jobs they're in and feel more fulfilled. So

[00:03:44] how would people connect with you?

[00:03:46] Sure. Well, I always say, get, get a taste, right? Before we begin to purchase anything,

[00:03:53] before we put our dollars anywhere, we want to sample. We want to see if this is the place that

[00:03:58] we need to put our money, right? So one of the areas that I am really big on is YouTube. So I'm

[00:04:05] under Dr. Janine Mobley. I'm on Instagram is Dr. Janine Mobley, like get all of the sampling content. And

[00:04:12] I'm also, for those of you all who are active on Facebook, I'm under Dr. Janine on Facebook. That way

[00:04:18] you get to see, okay, who is this woman? Let me see if she consistent, right? Because a lot of the times,

[00:04:23] people are hesitant about investing their money because we know majority of the time we determine

[00:04:29] where we put our dollars based on the brand that we know we like and we trust, whether it's our

[00:04:35] experience directly or through the experience of someone else. So definitely make sure you go over

[00:04:43] there and get some of the free stuff, get some of the sampling to see whether you even want to

[00:04:48] be with this lady or not. Right. I like that. I also have a video series that's called

[00:04:56] the five mistakes that women make that prevent them from profiting from their purpose. And you can

[00:05:02] get that. I believe I shared the link with you, but it's Dr. Janine.net forward slash five mistakes.

[00:05:09] I love that. Thank you. You're welcome. Thank you for asking.

[00:05:13] No, of course. I freaking love that. I think that's awesome. What I really love about it is

[00:05:19] I actually subscribe to a different, what is it called? People who help you get your life together.

[00:05:24] Life coach. I don't like that, that, that moniker side discards of people who like give me tools and,

[00:05:29] and tricks and life hacks to help me be a better human and very few of them look like me.

[00:05:36] Got you.

[00:05:37] And so what I really love about what you're doing is like, yes, there's someone out there who's doing it

[00:05:43] who looks like me. And no shade, not saying that they're not doing a good job because they are,

[00:05:50] but it's just like this extra connectedness for me personally, that representation matters. And it's

[00:05:56] like, okay. I would assume that there are certain things culturally that, that is just automatically

[00:06:02] there that, that a woman, a black woman could, could share. And that experience can resonate with

[00:06:08] me even more. And so I really appreciate that you're occupying that space. So thank you so much.

[00:06:15] Thank you. Thank you for saying that. Thank you. I am. I'm so passionate about it because

[00:06:21] I realized that the struggle is real for so many people. And because I survived, not survived it,

[00:06:28] but because I existed in it because I wasn't living, I was existing in it for so long. And now

[00:06:35] that I have gotten the tools, I am going to help as many women who are willing so that they, it will

[00:06:43] be a rippling effect because it's not about us, but it's about those who will come after us. It's about

[00:06:48] those who are looking to us, even whether it's your children, whether it's your nieces, your nephews,

[00:06:53] or maybe somebody who's watching you virtually that's looking up to you and you have no clue about.

[00:06:59] Yeah. Come through legacy. Come on. Come on legacy.

[00:07:02] Yes. Yes, yes, yes.

[00:07:04] I love that. So Dr. Janine, tell me how do you define resilience?

[00:07:10] Oh gosh. So the way that I define resilience is one, it's personal and it's the way that we persevere

[00:07:21] through some of the greatest challenges while identifying the lesson in the season.

[00:07:30] Oh my goodness. That's new. That's an add on. That's the first. Okay.

[00:07:35] Oh, it is. Yes. Yes. And the reason why I say that, and you may ask me if you want to,

[00:07:42] I can go into detail, but, and I'm not sure if I shared this with you, but in 2012,

[00:07:47] I was fired from my job. My husband and I lost just like our place of living. Our vehicle was

[00:07:54] re-posed and we were homeless for maybe about a little bit over a year. And it was during that

[00:08:03] season of my life that I literally walked through resilience, still walking through some things,

[00:08:11] but that was really the biggest area and the experience where I really had to walk through

[00:08:17] resilience. I was going to ask you based off of your definition of resilience, do you feel resilient?

[00:08:23] But you already just let me know you walk through that. You said I, because it's in the definition,

[00:08:29] right? You said I walked through it. So let me let me know. I fully embodied it.

[00:08:33] It was not easy. One of the misconceptions about resilience, as I talk to people is that resilience

[00:08:40] means that obstacles happen and you're just like, Oh, I'm resilient. Everything's fine. And that's not

[00:08:46] it. So can you, can you talk a little bit more in detail about how you embodied, how you learned to

[00:08:52] be resilient and what that journey was like for you? Well, I'll be honest. The foundation of my brand

[00:08:59] is built on my relationship with Jesus Christ. And I would be totally lying to you. If I said,

[00:09:09] I did it by myself. It was literally my relationship with Christ, because I understand

[00:09:14] that there are a lot of believers out there who say that we believe Jesus Christ. However,

[00:09:21] we lack a relationship. And when we think about marriage, when we think about friendships,

[00:09:27] the strength of our friendships and our marriages come through the interacting of relationships,

[00:09:34] how do we interact? We conversate. We may not talk every single day, but there's still a dialogue.

[00:09:40] There is still some type of interaction to deepen that connection. And it was through my relationship

[00:09:47] with Jesus Christ and the people that I surrounded myself with, me always working on myself,

[00:09:54] that increased my resilience to be able to soar through what was one of the most challenging

[00:10:01] experiences of my life. Cause I had never been homeless before. Right. And at the same time I

[00:10:07] was married, I had a doctorate degree. So for me, that was like an ego check because look, girl,

[00:10:14] are you homeless with a doctorate degree? And then to find out not too later, not too long later that I

[00:10:20] was pregnant with our son. So not only were we going through this, it's something different when

[00:10:26] you're bringing children into the world. Yeah. So that gave me a whole nother level of resilience

[00:10:35] to persevere because it's not just about you, Janine, but it's about the person and the people

[00:10:41] that are coming after you, where you have to demonstrate this thing. You got to demonstrate

[00:10:46] that you believe you got to demonstrate that, you know, that this right here is not permanent.

[00:10:51] It's just temporary. Yeah. So that's when I began to identify and find out what is it that I need to

[00:10:58] learn from this? And once I answered that question and it was an ongoing question. Now there were times

[00:11:06] where it was challenging. My husband and I bumped heads because this is one of the things and tell me if

[00:11:12] I'm talking too much. You're not, you are not, please. But one of the things that people, like you were

[00:11:16] saying, they don't share the challenges along the way we, they want, we want to see people because

[00:11:24] people want to see the success. But what happens is when you have people who are just starting out in

[00:11:30] entrepreneurship, just starting out in life and maybe young and has never experienced any challenges

[00:11:36] on their own, they're thinking something wrong with them because they don't have it perfect and all

[00:11:40] together. But I'll be honest to say, I cried. I was frustrated. Right. But after that, I realized,

[00:11:49] okay, this is where I developed skills to build my health because I had a friend who had a workout

[00:11:56] studio and she would, she didn't charge me to come in and exercise. Right. I volunteered,

[00:12:01] although I was homeless, I went in and use my gift to be able to empower other women. It's like,

[00:12:07] well, that's not, Janine, how can you do that? Well, I know that if I'm giving something,

[00:12:13] the law is that it's going to come back to me anyway. And it did.

[00:12:18] Right. It always does. It always does. Yes. Cause that's the law. It does. And people don't even

[00:12:23] realize it, but sometimes we think that it has to come back the exact way we gave it. And so when it

[00:12:29] doesn't necessarily, or immediately, so if it doesn't happen immediately or the exact way we gave it,

[00:12:33] we're like, Oh, it didn't come back. It always comes back. There's a thing that you said that I,

[00:12:41] I want to circle back to. Sure. You said during this time you worked on yourself and I, I, I love that.

[00:12:50] There's this thing that I keep hearing from guests over and over again of, yeah, I worked on myself or,

[00:12:57] or yeah, I started reading books or yeah, I wanted to there. Not everyone does that. And I,

[00:13:04] I'm trying to figure out, is it something that's innate in certain people? Or if it's

[00:13:11] something that happens that triggers that, because I know what a good amount of people who don't work

[00:13:19] on themselves don't in no shade at all. Right. Everyone, we all had different paths,

[00:13:24] but I'm just curious as to why there are certain individuals who are, who are driven to improve,

[00:13:32] grow, change, whatever that adjective we want to use. And there are certain individuals who are

[00:13:39] comfortable, complacent, or fear the change. I don't know what it is, but for those who say,

[00:13:46] I worked on myself and each person who said it in whatever variation, it's always been like, yeah,

[00:13:53] I just did it. And I, I do that as well. And so that's how I'm catching it when I'm hearing people

[00:14:01] say it, but I am surrounded by people who don't. And I'm trying to understand what it is. What is it?

[00:14:08] Is it something that's innately in you that was like, yeah, it's time for me to work on myself during

[00:14:13] this challenging session? Or is it something that you feel like God told you? Is it innate that God tell

[00:14:20] you? Is it just like, what triggered that working on yourself? Have you always been that way?

[00:14:26] Okay. So let me answer the last question. I wouldn't say that I've always been the person

[00:14:34] that worked on myself because I had low self-esteem. I lacked confidence. I was in self-doubt. Right.

[00:14:40] And that stemmed from the opinions of other people. So it wasn't until I probably transitioned

[00:14:46] into college and even more so as I transitioned out of college that I all, I realized that there was

[00:14:54] something more to me and for me, even outside of my degree. And I didn't realize that that was a

[00:15:02] mindset of prosperity until I actually started teaching on it. Right. So we think about a mindset

[00:15:10] of prosperity. One of the key areas is progression. So if I'm progress, I'm not staying where I am.

[00:15:18] I'm taking necessary steps to get to something that's even greater. Correct. Right. So when you have a

[00:15:26] mindset that you realize that this, even where I am right now, although I'm grateful for it,

[00:15:33] it's not a permanent place. Yes. And I believe that the way that God created us

[00:15:39] is that we're, we are constantly growing and becoming better in some way. So I connect that

[00:15:48] to my belief in my relationship with God, because I understand that he's the creator of the universe.

[00:15:54] So in him being the creator of the universe, and he's always giving people ideas to build something

[00:16:00] better, to do something greater, then guess what? I'm his creation. So I'm made in that same way.

[00:16:06] Come on. So in order for me to get the more, in order for me to get the greater, in order for me to

[00:16:11] be more impactful, I got to become better. And just to add, even in the seasons where

[00:16:20] it wasn't so great, I realized, and I'm always recognizing, even as a wife and as a mother,

[00:16:26] I can't control everybody all of the time, but what and who can I control? I can control my emotions

[00:16:35] and I can control me. I can't control how you're going to respond nor react, but I can control how

[00:16:41] I respond and how I react. Yeah. So for me, I wouldn't say it may have been innate. Maybe it's

[00:16:49] something that awakened to me when I was receptive to it, but I embraced it as I got a little bit older.

[00:16:58] That makes sense. I love that. So I'm hearing that, that maturity piece, that willingness,

[00:17:03] that openness, that wanting, I'm hearing so many things. So one of the things I want to touch

[00:17:07] is that, uh, that mindset shift, right? You said when I, when I started to have that mindset of

[00:17:13] prosperity. And so there seems like there's this underlying mindset of what's the opposite of

[00:17:20] lack, lack, lack, lack, lack mindset. And I, I did struggle with that. And I think about that.

[00:17:26] I'm realizing as I'm talking to people that I am, I am becoming more passionate about

[00:17:34] black women. So women in general, we are taught that our value lies in our beauty.

[00:17:41] Are you pretty? How long are your lashes? How long is your hair? Is your body perfect? We're taught

[00:17:47] that. That's, that's what we have to, that's one of the main things we have to contribute to society.

[00:17:52] And so I'm surrounded by women, including myself who focused on projecting that beautiful image. I

[00:18:01] want to be surrounded by women who are saying, I want to be as beautiful on the inside, or I even want

[00:18:07] to feel as beautiful on the inside as I do on the outside. And so I started that by saying,

[00:18:12] I'm realizing I'm more passionate about that with black women. I'm women in general, but

[00:18:17] I have a little extra specialness for black women that I want, cause I'm working on that. And I'm

[00:18:22] just like, I want to be surrounded by women who are also working on that. Yes. Look good on the

[00:18:28] outside because it makes us feel good now for others. But also if I just have one t-shirt and

[00:18:35] whatever, that's not making me feel be, how do I feel about me when I'm by myself? If I don't have

[00:18:42] own lashes, if my hair isn't styled perfectly, if I don't have my makeup done to the gods,

[00:18:48] how do I feel? And so I'm very, very passionate about that. And that's why I love bringing on

[00:18:55] people who build up other women. So that's why. So thank you.

[00:19:00] You're welcome.

[00:19:01] I love that. Like every time I bring on beautiful women who are making the world more beautiful,

[00:19:08] it lifts my soul. So thank you.

[00:19:11] You're welcome. Thank you for having me.

[00:19:14] What made you smile today?

[00:19:17] Oh gosh. Gratitude.

[00:19:20] Oh, please elaborate.

[00:19:22] I was, I have, and this is just, I have conversations with myself and I've, and my

[00:19:29] husband, when I say that my husband used to always laugh at me, cause he was like, you

[00:19:32] always talking to yourself. And my sister was like, I said to my sister, she was like,

[00:19:37] what are you talking about? One of the ways that I navigate through either inner toil or

[00:19:45] challenges is I have to acknowledge where I am.

[00:19:52] And the power in that is I get to release whatever was trying to hold on to me.

[00:20:02] And I think one of the things that people have mastered, and I think it's something that has

[00:20:08] carried on for generations, whether it was in your family or whether you were surrounded by

[00:20:13] other women in this case, who were taught to put the lipstick on,

[00:20:20] wear the hair, dress to the nine and nobody you should ever see you go through or sweat

[00:20:27] through anything. Right.

[00:20:29] I forgot about that lesson. That lesson was taught. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

[00:20:32] So for me, I, I was the opposite. Like I'm, I'm trying to dispel that because I observed

[00:20:43] those women struggle with addiction, struggle with identity. And one of the things that I understand

[00:20:50] is that what we don't deal with will deal with us regardless.

[00:20:54] It will.

[00:20:55] So another law.

[00:20:57] Yeah. Even if you put on the makeup and now we, you know, you put on the lashes and you put on the

[00:21:02] foundation and you put on the hair and here's the thing, you still jacked up on the inside.

[00:21:08] And what people don't realize is that how can you want to serve? What I like to call from a,

[00:21:14] a full cup, a cup of wholeness, a cup of peace, a cup of joy, not a cup of bitterness,

[00:21:22] not a cup of anger, not a cup of self doubt. And this is why it's important that we must heal first

[00:21:30] before we talking about serving somebody else. You got to serve you first. I said yesterday,

[00:21:36] how can you expect to lead somebody else when you ain't lead your own ship?

[00:21:41] Ooh. Yeah.

[00:21:43] And these are things that I deal with consistently with myself always because I can't expect to lead

[00:21:51] clients. I can't expect to lead a team of people if I'm jacked up because guess what? Those team

[00:21:57] of people and those clients going to end up being jacked up in some area. Cause I ain't whole.

[00:22:02] So that whole super woman complex that people have, you know, coined as not wearing your emotions on

[00:22:09] your shoulder. No, let's be honest about where we are so we can heal and our daughters and our sons

[00:22:14] and our husbands.

[00:22:16] Yes. There's this thing of vulnerability and how we've been taught that it's weakness and it's not.

[00:22:24] Let's be vulnerable. Let's be open. Let's help each other heal. Because when we're vulnerable,

[00:22:29] it allows us to be more compassionate when others are vulnerable.

[00:22:34] Absolutely.

[00:22:34] I am with you 100% on everything you said. Amen.

[00:22:37] I love it. I love it.

[00:22:39] Dr. Janine, how do you celebrate yourself?

[00:22:42] Gosh, I literally, you know how they tell you to give yourself a pat on the back. I'm a pat on the

[00:22:47] backer and I'm like a congratulator. Like, like even when I'm exercising, cause I do Leslie

[00:22:53] stand songs, walk the pound sometimes, or if I, whatever it is that I do, like, I'm like,

[00:22:59] girl, you need that. Like literally, because I realized there was so much, there were seasons

[00:23:06] in my life, especially when I was a young girl that I didn't celebrate myself. And what happens

[00:23:11] is you're looking for, if you're not careful, you're looking for somebody else to affirm you

[00:23:17] and to congratulate you. And I'm like, girl, you did it. Like even last night, I'll be honest. Like

[00:23:23] sometimes I don't feel like going live. Sometimes I don't feel like doing stuff that's needed for my

[00:23:27] business. And just to be a wife and a mom, but guess what? When I do what I need to do,

[00:23:32] I congratulate me and it makes me feel amazing. It gives me that boost to keep going. Cause I'm not

[00:23:40] looking for somebody else to tell me, Oh, great job. If they do. Thank you. I appreciate it.

[00:23:45] Right. But yes. I literally tell myself congratulations. Like even after this podcast,

[00:23:55] congratulations. I've said this so many times. I started to podcast so that I could have tools

[00:24:02] for others, but I get so much, so much from my guests. You just poured into me because I do not

[00:24:10] congratulate myself. I'm actually pretty hard on myself. I am the, I am my oldest teases me or talks

[00:24:17] to me about how hard I am on myself. I'm like, Oh, I did that, but it could have been better or

[00:24:24] I do not. And so thank you. You're welcome. I'm going to do my best. It's going to be a transition

[00:24:31] to transition from being hard on myself. Or the other thing I'll do is if I, if I've done something

[00:24:36] like I did that check next. And so I'm going to try to implement. So you just spoke. I need to know,

[00:24:42] you just spoke right directly into my soul. Oh, you're welcome. I felt that. I felt that. And I,

[00:24:48] I need to do better at that. We're always learning and growing. We never stopped learning and growing

[00:24:53] and I'm going to do my best to implement that because I, I want to be kinder to myself.

[00:25:00] Right. And I think you know that I I'm, I'm learning because it's, it's, it's me unlearning

[00:25:06] adults weren't kind to me. And so I didn't learn to be kind to myself. So it's me unlearning those

[00:25:10] things. And so I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm learning that. And so I'm going to try to congratulate myself.

[00:25:17] I do talk to myself a lot, like talk through things and people tease me like, what are you

[00:25:21] doing? I'm, I'm consulting the expert. Of course that's what I'm doing. And that's what I say,

[00:25:26] but I have not picked up that congratulating myself and thank you. Like you don't even

[00:25:32] understand how you just spoke into my soul right now. So thank you for that.

[00:25:35] Oh, you are welcome. And you, can I give you a perspective?

[00:25:38] Yes.

[00:25:39] Okay. I haven't started my own podcast because it's a whole production. Okay.

[00:25:43] I have a whole husband and three small children at home. And because I understand the effort that

[00:25:52] it takes to put something like this on the fact that you are consistent with it, you have a whole

[00:25:59] system set up to make it smooth, not only for yourself, but for the guests, you honor people and

[00:26:06] your brand enough all about perspective in the position of our mindset. You honor yourself and

[00:26:13] your brand and your guests enough to make it a smooth transition for them to come on your show.

[00:26:18] Then after that, you have to create, that ain't it. You got to create the graphics. You got to market this

[00:26:23] thing. You got to share it. You got to post it on all these different platforms.

[00:26:29] Every step of the way, girl, you did it. You did that. You did that. Thank you. So honor yourself

[00:26:39] because, and here's the thing. And then you can tell me again, if I'm talking too much,

[00:26:43] you are not talking too much.

[00:26:45] I could care less. Remember that our children learn more by demonstration than they do.

[00:26:54] Yes, they do. Correct.

[00:26:55] So the more you congratulate yourself, oh baby, them children are going to be rooting themselves on.

[00:27:01] Stop it. I didn't even think about it that way.

[00:27:05] Oh yeah. Yeah. That's, that's an added layer of responsibility.

[00:27:09] It is. It is. My goodness. Thank you so much. And I want to circle back to what we talked about

[00:27:15] earlier about, um, when you give it out, you get it. I absolutely love pouring into people. I

[00:27:21] actually call it, giving people their flowers while they're here instead of waiting until they're

[00:27:26] gone. And I do that a lot. And you just gave me my flowers. Thank you.

[00:27:29] So it came back. You're welcome. See?

[00:27:31] And I don't do it to get it back. I do it because it feels good when I do it. And it just came back.

[00:27:36] So thank you.

[00:27:37] You're welcome. I appreciate that.

[00:27:38] You're welcome. Thank you so much.

[00:27:40] Okay. So you ready for this question?

[00:27:42] Sure.

[00:27:42] It's morning and you are feeling yourself. You're like, yes. What's the theme song that pops into your head?

[00:27:52] Gosh. When you just ask that question, Mary, Mary, go get it. You remember that old song?

[00:27:57] Go get it, go, get it, go, get it, go, get it, go, get it, go, get it, go, get it, go, get it, go, get it, go, get it, go, get it, go, get it, go, get it, go, get it, go, get it.

[00:28:02] I forgot about that song. Yes.

[00:28:05] So, and the reason why that popped up is one, it gives me energy. Like it gives me that pump.

[00:28:11] And it makes me realize that God has given me all power, might, ability, and strength to go out and get everything that he created me to have.

[00:28:28] Not your pastor, your preacher. That's right. That's right. No one's saving you, boo. Yes. Yes. I love that.

[00:28:37] That's a really good one. And usually what I like about that question is I get introduced to so many new songs and I don't usually know the song that the person, but I didn't know that song.

[00:28:48] So that was actually really cool. And I actually like Mary, Mary. I like them. They're really good.

[00:28:51] But tell me this, what have you learned about yourself recently?

[00:28:57] Oh, Ooh, that I like to be in control.

[00:29:02] And so much to the point where I like to be in control of how everything goes almost to a fault because the downside of that now we do need to control our emotions.

[00:29:17] We do need to be able to control how we respond. But when you set goals, you determine what the, what you want to accomplish, but you necessarily, you don't necessarily get to control how fast the outcome comes.

[00:29:32] So in the process of doing what is necessary to achieve the goal, I have gotten sometimes frustrated because I want to control when it happens, how it happens and the timing.

[00:29:45] I mean, but I realized girl, sit your behind down.

[00:29:51] Yeah.

[00:29:51] Be patient in the process because the process is what's going to help you to persevere and what's going and gives God the opportunity to perfect you in areas that you need to be perfected so you can have what you say you want.

[00:30:04] Come on. Come on. Yes.

[00:30:07] Yeah.

[00:30:07] So there's this thing of that I'm learning. I'm a recovering type A because I had to, I had to have control.

[00:30:14] Ah.

[00:30:15] And that caused me so much stress and anxiety. And so in my beliefs, I would say I'm more spiritual than religious. And so like I incorporate a little Buddhism. I incorporate a little Christianity. Like it's just, it's, it's the thing that I pulled together to help me feel whole.

[00:30:32] And the biggest lesson is like surrendering. So it's like, yes, I, it's this balance of I'm manifesting slash working to make it happen, but also surrendering to how it comes to me, which includes that timing, what it looks like, because I'm like, yes, I want this.

[00:30:50] Just for, as an example, I want a house and I want it to look like this. And then I get my house and I build it and I'm like, I like it. It's just different than what I thought. And it's like, bro, you grew up homeless.

[00:31:04] Because really, you didn't have a house growing up. Like literally you grew up homeless and you're going to say that's not the perfect shade of blue for Nikita. And so those things, right. So learning to be grateful, go back to that gratitude.

[00:31:16] You talk about learning, surrendering to not that control. It's like not nitpicking and just being grateful and surrendering and, and trusting the process. That one's hard for me. Right. That timing piece, that trusting didn't happen right away. I wanted a house and it took literally six years before I got it. So, you know, that was hard, right. To trust that. And so I get it. I said that to say, I totally understand. And I'm still,

[00:31:46] I'm getting better with that trusting process, but it sneaks in like, Hey, I've been praying for this for a minute. What's going on Jesus? We talked about this.

[00:31:54] And so I like, because I incorporate in my beliefs, I believe that it's all one. And we just choose like, do we want to call this Jesus? Do we want to call it God? Do we want to call it Allah? I honor all of that. Right. And so I'll switch it up. I'm like, universe, what are we doing? Jesus. We talked about this. Right. And so, because I believe it's all, it's all one. And so I'm like, we've talked about this.

[00:32:16] And I always give back three lies. You're okay. You're safe. You're okay. So I can resonate with what you're saying. So I get it. I totally get it. And thank you for sharing that.

[00:32:25] You're welcome.

[00:32:27] What brings you joy?

[00:32:29] Peace.

[00:32:30] Please elaborate.

[00:32:31] I can buy whatever I want to buy.

[00:32:34] Come on.

[00:32:35] Right.

[00:32:35] I can make the money I want to make.

[00:32:39] I can do the things majority of the time that I want to do, but I can't buy peace and I value it.

[00:32:49] Yes.

[00:32:50] I value the peace that I create and I value the peace that I have because I can't buy it.

[00:32:58] Yeah.

[00:32:58] So that brings me the greatest joy.

[00:33:01] Yeah.

[00:33:02] Because I mean, anybody can go out and make money, but there are people out there with boatloads of money and have no peace.

[00:33:09] Yes.

[00:33:09] I would say peace is a very broad term.

[00:33:14] Will you define for us what you mean by peace?

[00:33:17] The opposite of chaos.

[00:33:20] So that can be the absence of mental chaos.

[00:33:23] Yes.

[00:33:24] There it is.

[00:33:24] The absence of emotional chaos.

[00:33:28] The fact that I literally love myself.

[00:33:31] Yes.

[00:33:32] Without makeup on, without lashes on, even though I wear it.

[00:33:35] I was going to say, and it's okay to wear it.

[00:33:37] Yes.

[00:33:37] Yes.

[00:33:38] Yes.

[00:33:38] I wear it without the nails, without all of the stuff.

[00:33:42] Like I really genuinely like myself.

[00:33:45] Yeah.

[00:33:46] I love my life.

[00:33:47] I'm grateful for it.

[00:33:51] And that is peace for me.

[00:33:53] Yes.

[00:33:53] Yes.

[00:33:54] That's peace for me.

[00:33:55] Like even always, we have a rule.

[00:33:58] My mom used to have this rule when we were growing up that after the world has beat you down, home is where you should be able to come and get the greatest peace ever.

[00:34:10] And adding to that after I separate myself from other people, because again, I can't control other people, but I can't control me.

[00:34:19] Even in the midst, while you may be acting foolish, I still have peace.

[00:34:23] Come on.

[00:34:24] Right.

[00:34:25] I know how to withdraw or separate myself from chaos, even if you are the chaotic one.

[00:34:30] Yeah.

[00:34:31] Right.

[00:34:31] So that's the importance of having internal peace, spiritual, mental, emotional.

[00:34:37] So that even when you separate yourself from external factors, you still have a reason to smile.

[00:34:44] Yes.

[00:34:45] I love that.

[00:34:46] And rest.

[00:34:47] Yes.

[00:34:48] There it is.

[00:34:48] That piece.

[00:34:49] So very similarly, when I think about peace, I think about like this calmness, this quietness, and this ability to be by myself without that mental noise, for lack of a better word.

[00:35:04] But for me, it went in stages.

[00:35:06] First, I had to create a peaceful environment.

[00:35:10] And so that's not how I grew up.

[00:35:12] There was lots of noise and not necessarily music because music can be peaceful.

[00:35:19] And so that's why I want to clarify when we're discussing what that peacefulness is, noise, which caused me to feel anxious or it had my nervous system activated.

[00:35:32] So that alertness, we'll use that word.

[00:35:34] And so I would be on alert.

[00:35:37] And then so I had to learn to make my environment calm.

[00:35:42] And then I had to learn to be calm in here because then it's quiet now in my house.

[00:35:49] And I'm like, oh, it's too quiet.

[00:35:50] I need noise.

[00:35:51] Like, let's turn on a show.

[00:35:54] I got to move.

[00:35:55] I can't.

[00:35:56] Right.

[00:35:56] And so it happened for me in stages.

[00:35:59] And I would imagine for those who have not found that level of peace yet, it's okay to go in stages.

[00:36:07] Don't feel like it's like cold turkey and peaceful.

[00:36:09] And don't beat yourself up if you're peaceful in this area but not in this area.

[00:36:13] Baby steps.

[00:36:14] Take your time.

[00:36:14] And then once I had my environment quiet and I had to learn to say, okay.

[00:36:20] Okay.

[00:36:22] Nikita.

[00:36:22] Hi.

[00:36:23] How's it going in there?

[00:36:24] What's going on?

[00:36:25] And so that was next for me.

[00:36:27] Right.

[00:36:28] But then I had to learn to say, oh, I think I like her.

[00:36:31] Hey, Nikita.

[00:36:32] I think I like you.

[00:36:33] How's it going in there?

[00:36:34] At first it was like, I don't know you.

[00:36:36] Who are you?

[00:36:37] And why are you saying all these mean things?

[00:36:40] And so now I'm learning to say, oh, I like her.

[00:36:43] And now I crave that alone time, that peace so that I can reconnect with myself.

[00:36:50] So thank you for clarifying that.

[00:36:52] You're welcome.

[00:36:53] You're welcome.

[00:36:54] When do you let your inner child out to play?

[00:36:59] Oh, God.

[00:37:00] That could be silliness.

[00:37:01] That could be just cracking jokes.

[00:37:04] Whatever your inner child looks like for you.

[00:37:08] What do you let that?

[00:37:09] Look, I've been doing it for the past couple of what we, how long we've been doing this for

[00:37:13] the past couple of 30 minutes.

[00:37:14] I love that.

[00:37:15] You know, with children, there's really no cap.

[00:37:18] There's no filter at all.

[00:37:21] And I mean, as adults, you know what not to say, right?

[00:37:25] Or you should know what not to say.

[00:37:27] But I learned to do it in my personal time.

[00:37:30] I learned to do it when I'm in a relaxed state.

[00:37:33] Um, and that's just a part of who I am as a personal brand.

[00:37:39] I love to have fun.

[00:37:40] And here's the thing.

[00:37:41] This is my purpose.

[00:37:42] This is what I'm called to do.

[00:37:43] And if I can't enjoy it or let my inner child out while doing the very thing that God created

[00:37:49] me to do, what's the point?

[00:37:51] What's the point?

[00:37:53] What's the point?

[00:37:54] And that's just how I see it.

[00:37:55] What's the point?

[00:37:56] I mean, this is, this is a gift and it brings me joy.

[00:38:01] Okay.

[00:38:01] Okay.

[00:38:01] So yeah, any, every chance that I can get, like I do it with my oldest and he gets so

[00:38:06] embarrassed.

[00:38:07] He gets so mama.

[00:38:09] Look, I'll drop them off and get out and start dancing.

[00:38:13] Yes.

[00:38:14] Yeah.

[00:38:14] Yeah.

[00:38:15] Cause I want them to, again, children learn more by demonstration than by conversation.

[00:38:19] They do.

[00:38:19] And I want them to understand that you can enjoy your life without, uh, without people

[00:38:26] placing limits on you.

[00:38:27] For people who haven't been able to connect with their inner child or they don't even know

[00:38:32] how, do you have any words to share with them on how to do that?

[00:38:36] Well, for some people, their inner child is trauma.

[00:38:40] When they think about their childhood is trauma based.

[00:38:43] The foundation is built on trauma.

[00:38:45] So being able to go back to a place that was traumatic for them is hard, right?

[00:38:52] They equate being a child to the terror that they experienced growing up.

[00:39:00] Yeah.

[00:39:01] But here's my thing.

[00:39:03] You have to first acknowledge.

[00:39:06] I always, my sister and I had this conversation this weekend and I agree that you cannot,

[00:39:12] I say this, you cannot heal something that you don't acknowledge is wrong.

[00:39:17] And I think people are walking around with weeping wounds because they don't want to acknowledge

[00:39:24] that something is bothering them.

[00:39:27] And the only way that you're going to get the joy and the peace and, and experience the

[00:39:34] joy of an inner child is when you embrace what is your greatest pain, even if it stems back to your childhood.

[00:39:44] Because in order to kill a tree, you can't just chop off the leaves and the fruit because it's going to grow back.

[00:39:52] You got to pull that sucker up out of the ground and make sure that that part.

[00:39:59] I had a guest and she gave this phrase that I said I was stealing and it's appropriate time to steal it right now.

[00:40:05] She gave me permission.

[00:40:06] She was amazing.

[00:40:07] And she said, in order to feel the void, you have to feel the void, right?

[00:40:13] And so you can't feel to pour in that void until you take the time to feel it, to experience it.

[00:40:20] And I was like, that is it.

[00:40:23] That's it.

[00:40:23] Like, that's it.

[00:40:24] And it's exactly, so I'm noticing now this, this recurring theme that that is it.

[00:40:29] We have this difficulty as humans of, of addressing and facing and feeling that pain.

[00:40:38] And, but we're stuck when we don't, we're stuck and we can't grow and we can't heal because we won't get to,

[00:40:45] to use your words, the root.

[00:40:47] We want to get to the bottom.

[00:40:49] Yeah.

[00:40:50] Yeah.

[00:40:51] I agree with that.

[00:40:52] And so what typically happens is we will numb or we'll go on autopilot.

[00:40:58] And so we'll numb with food.

[00:40:59] People don't realize how much we numb with food.

[00:41:02] We'll numb with food, we'll numb with alcohol or drugs or sex or whatever.

[00:41:07] Again, no judgment.

[00:41:09] But I'm noticing this, yeah, but I'm noticing this pattern of we don't want to feel that.

[00:41:15] We don't want to experience that or relive it.

[00:41:17] And so it's like, I'm going to do all these other things.

[00:41:20] So that was very, very insightful and, and very, it was confirmation.

[00:41:24] So thank you for that.

[00:41:26] You're welcome.

[00:41:27] You're welcome.

[00:41:28] Tell me this.

[00:41:29] How is your self-talk?

[00:41:31] Which I think I'm, I know your answer.

[00:41:33] Are you, are you challenging negative thoughts?

[00:41:37] Yeah.

[00:41:37] I would be lying if I said no.

[00:41:40] Okay.

[00:41:40] Because here's the thing.

[00:41:43] In order to progress, you have to step out of your comfort zone.

[00:41:46] What, and that means what it is that you know, and you're comfortable with and that you can

[00:41:50] do without having your eyes closed.

[00:41:53] So for someone who is excelling, because I always look at myself is excelling and progressing,

[00:42:01] which means I have to step out of my comfort zone.

[00:42:04] What does that look like?

[00:42:05] And all transparency, that's pitching.

[00:42:07] That is calling people on the phone and having conversations about sharing with them what it is

[00:42:14] that I do.

[00:42:15] Right.

[00:42:15] And putting yourself in vulnerable places.

[00:42:18] So I have to have those conversations to remind myself, girl, you are the solution to somebody's

[00:42:23] problem.

[00:42:24] So you have to, you must, you got to step out of your comfort zone.

[00:42:30] You got to pick up the phone.

[00:42:31] You got open up that laptop and share who you are.

[00:42:36] You got to tell people the solution that you have to their problem.

[00:42:39] So I'm all like, a lot of times I'm giving myself self-talks because I know that there's

[00:42:46] a greater level for me to accomplish.

[00:42:48] And if I don't overcome the conversations that are trying to stop me from the very thing

[00:42:54] that I know that I should be doing, I'll remain stagnant.

[00:42:57] Yes.

[00:42:58] And I love that.

[00:43:00] And you made it sound easy.

[00:43:02] And it's not.

[00:43:03] No.

[00:43:04] And I'm just, I don't mean that as an insult to you.

[00:43:06] And I hope I did not.

[00:43:07] It's not.

[00:43:07] When I said that.

[00:43:08] What tools would you have?

[00:43:11] Practical tools that you have for people who struggle with that negative self-talk?

[00:43:16] What can people do to challenge those negative thoughts and words that come up?

[00:43:22] Here's the thing.

[00:43:23] And it goes back to understanding that you got to acknowledge that it even exists.

[00:43:29] So many people are trying to progress or move forward when you haven't even acknowledged

[00:43:39] where you are.

[00:43:40] If we look at the steps to recovery, they tell you that's the first thing you have to do.

[00:43:44] You have to acknowledge that this is how you feel.

[00:43:46] If you are afraid, then you may not say that you are afraid, but you have to acknowledge that

[00:43:51] this is how you feel in the moment.

[00:43:53] Right?

[00:43:53] If it's uncomfortable, this is uncomfortable.

[00:43:56] But here's the other thing that I always remind myself of is, and I tell my clients this when we

[00:44:02] work through mindset, is that you have to understand when you're moving in a place of purpose that you

[00:44:07] have a solution to somebody's problem.

[00:44:09] So even if you're working on a job, you still have a solution to your company's problem.

[00:44:16] So if you don't step up and make people aware, which means that you have to overcome the conversations

[00:44:23] in your head.

[00:44:24] And this is what happens.

[00:44:25] People get stuck in the thought.

[00:44:28] Yes.

[00:44:29] Instead of realizing that we have the power, the might, and the ability to make the shift out

[00:44:36] of, and here it comes.

[00:44:38] So you have to acknowledge, and then you have to make a decision that you're going to shift.

[00:44:44] See, we acknowledging.

[00:44:46] Yeah.

[00:44:46] So you got to acknowledge.

[00:44:47] This is how I feel.

[00:44:48] So you got to make a decision that I'm not going to stay here.

[00:44:52] See, what happens is people stay, they stay in the self doubt and they, and here's the thing.

[00:44:59] When you don't move, it's like sinking sand.

[00:45:03] You sink in the thought, you sink in the mindset, and you begin to believe the stories that you are

[00:45:11] telling yourself or somebody else has told you.

[00:45:14] So you got to acknowledge that this is how I feel.

[00:45:17] Number two, you got to make a decision that I'm not going to stay here.

[00:45:21] And number three, you have to, you have to take action.

[00:45:24] So ADA.

[00:45:25] So acknowledge, make a decision, and then take action on whatever it is that you're,

[00:45:31] that you're trying to be talked out of.

[00:45:33] So as an example, because I'll tell on me, as an example, because I always believe in

[00:45:39] entrepreneurship, you are taking leaps in some way, shape, form, fashion a whole lot.

[00:45:44] Correct.

[00:45:45] And I remember, because I do transformational Mondays on YouTube.

[00:45:50] And I remember when you go live, like, especially when you go live in a setting where

[00:45:56] there anybody can jump on, right?

[00:45:59] And thank God I'm a person who's very secure in how I look.

[00:46:04] Like, I'm not my hair.

[00:46:06] Like, I'm gorgeous.

[00:46:07] And I know it, right?

[00:46:08] Yes.

[00:46:08] So somebody came on and for like maybe three or four lives straight, different people came

[00:46:17] on asking, is that a man?

[00:46:20] Is that, no, we all know I don't look like no man, right?

[00:46:23] We all know.

[00:46:24] Okay.

[00:46:25] And I persevered like through the live, like, and it was so funny.

[00:46:29] It was so funny because I'm still me.

[00:46:32] So it was so funny.

[00:46:33] And I used to, in that moment, I confronted it because I'm usually not a, I wasn't a confrontational

[00:46:39] person, but then there were people who were going in, who were like going in on the people

[00:46:44] who were trying to go in on me.

[00:46:47] And I'll be honest, after I ended it and I had to go live again, like the following

[00:46:52] week, it was like, okay, there's probably going to be somebody on there.

[00:46:56] But here's the thing I realized.

[00:46:57] I was like, Janine, again, there's somebody who's looking for a solution to the problem

[00:47:02] that you solve.

[00:47:03] And the more you show up, you show them that you know how to persevere even through what

[00:47:10] may seem uncomfortable, right?

[00:47:12] Because there's somebody looking at me who's like, she's still talking and these people

[00:47:16] still being stupid, right?

[00:47:19] So I realized, again, I acknowledge how I felt, I made a decision that I wasn't going

[00:47:24] to stay there and I took action.

[00:47:25] I went right back on there and went live.

[00:47:28] Good job.

[00:47:29] So it's something that again, it's not easy, but you have to make a conscious decision that

[00:47:36] you, that you know that there's more and you're going to do what it takes.

[00:47:40] You're not going to just sit there and do all of the talking and not do nothing.

[00:47:46] And not, and not walk the walk.

[00:47:47] Oh yeah.

[00:47:48] Oh yeah.

[00:47:49] And I have to be the example because guess what?

[00:47:51] I'm coaching other women and do the same thing.

[00:47:53] So guess what?

[00:47:53] I got to be the first part.

[00:47:54] Hey, that's right.

[00:47:56] That's not true.

[00:47:57] That's very true for sure.

[00:48:00] What is something you're proud of?

[00:48:01] I'm proud of the fact that I didn't plummet through the challenging times because I could

[00:48:09] stayed, I could have soaked in sorrow, but I wouldn't have the life that I have on Thursday.

[00:48:20] I'll be 42 years young.

[00:48:22] Okay.

[00:48:24] Little sis.

[00:48:25] Little sis.

[00:48:29] Um, so I am so proud of the fact that I soared in the midst of what may have seemed sorrowful

[00:48:39] for other people just so that I can help some, be the light to help somebody get out of their

[00:48:45] darkness.

[00:48:46] And that's what I'm proud of.

[00:48:47] Like I wake up every morning and yes, I'm a, and here's the thing.

[00:48:52] I am proud of being a wife.

[00:48:54] I'm proud of being a mom, but before I can be a proud mother and a proud wife, I got to

[00:49:00] be a proud Janine.

[00:49:02] Oh, I got to congratulate Janine.

[00:49:04] And that is something that I work on because I can't show up for everybody else if I'm not

[00:49:11] showing up for me.

[00:49:13] So I'm, I'm so proud of myself that I continue to show up every day and be the amazing person

[00:49:20] that God created me to be.

[00:49:22] And I haven't even scratched the surface of this amazingness.

[00:49:27] You don't even understand how you're pouring into me right now.

[00:49:29] All about.

[00:49:31] Thank you.

[00:49:31] I appreciate that.

[00:49:32] What is the healthiest thing you've done for yourself?

[00:49:36] Gosh, the healthiest thing.

[00:49:38] So I believe that in order for us to remain physically healthy, we have to be internally

[00:49:43] healthy.

[00:49:44] So really taking care of me mentally and emotionally and spiritually is the healthiest thing that

[00:49:53] I have done.

[00:49:54] The healthiest thing.

[00:49:55] Like I'm, I'm very aware of my emotional health and my mental health.

[00:49:59] And because of that, it helps me to take better care of my physical health.

[00:50:05] I remember some years ago, I can't remember the gentleman's name.

[00:50:08] He was one of the fitness coaches.

[00:50:10] I believe on the biggest loser he had.

[00:50:13] Was it a heart attack?

[00:50:15] Oh, I cannot remember his name, but he did.

[00:50:18] He did a commercial and you would look at him like, dog, this man looks amazing.

[00:50:22] But I realized something internally was off.

[00:50:26] Right.

[00:50:27] Yeah.

[00:50:28] And I'm like, it's not, it's not all about physical.

[00:50:31] You got to take care of your internal self.

[00:50:35] Yeah.

[00:50:36] So that is, that is the healthiest thing that I've ever done for myself is take care

[00:50:41] of my mental and emotional health.

[00:50:43] I get a, and what does that look like?

[00:50:45] Okay.

[00:50:45] Cause I'm sure that's like the next question.

[00:50:47] Cause I want to make sure I pray a lot and I see a therapist.

[00:50:53] I remember one of the greatest gifts.

[00:50:56] My father passed away when I was 15 and one of the great, I was a big daddy's girl.

[00:51:03] Like my dad used to feed me.

[00:51:05] I was good and probably 14 years old.

[00:51:07] And my dad was, my dad was feeding me.

[00:51:10] And one of the greatest gifts that my mother, thank you.

[00:51:14] Thank you.

[00:51:14] I'm so, so grateful.

[00:51:15] So grateful.

[00:51:16] That is even a story of resilience.

[00:51:18] And one of the greatest gifts I always say that my mother gave me was a therapist when

[00:51:24] I had, because it exposed me.

[00:51:26] You know, people say, well, you know, culturally black people don't see therapists.

[00:51:31] And I'm like, but that wasn't my story.

[00:51:35] Yeah.

[00:51:36] You see what I'm saying?

[00:51:36] That wasn't my story because my mother exposed me to therapy.

[00:51:39] So when I had our daughter, I remember feeling anxious one day and again, being aware and

[00:51:48] acknowledging where I was, I'm like, okay, where is this anxiety coming from?

[00:51:52] Because I know that it's just a symptom of something that's underlying.

[00:51:58] And I immediately went, I prayed.

[00:52:02] I was like, God, please send me the right therapist.

[00:52:05] And I signed up for therapy.

[00:52:06] And I worked with the therapist shortly after I had my daughter.

[00:52:09] I worked with the therapist into my next pregnancy because during that time, COVID was like just

[00:52:17] coming in.

[00:52:18] And I was sheltered in place with two and a half children and homeschooling and life was

[00:52:24] just in trying to build a business.

[00:52:26] And it was just different.

[00:52:27] Yeah.

[00:52:28] So look, that's what that looks like.

[00:52:31] A therapist pray and also use the gift that God has given people a therapist.

[00:52:36] Yes.

[00:52:36] Yes.

[00:52:37] Yeah.

[00:52:38] What I love about that, Dr.

[00:52:39] Jenny is I've talked to Christians who are like, I don't need a therapist because I've

[00:52:45] got, God's going to deliver me.

[00:52:47] God's going to deliver me.

[00:52:48] And I'm learning to mind my business.

[00:52:50] But inside, I'm like, God created a medical doctor to help you.

[00:52:55] You don't say that about the medical doctor.

[00:52:56] You don't say, oh, my ankle is broken.

[00:52:59] God's going to heal it.

[00:53:00] Why do we do that about our mental health, about our emotional health?

[00:53:05] Well, I think, and let me let you finish your thought.

[00:53:08] Let me let you finish your thought.

[00:53:10] Go ahead.

[00:53:10] It was basically finished.

[00:53:12] I was just going to acknowledge that you are a professed Christian.

[00:53:16] And you're saying, I know that both things are true.

[00:53:20] And I just want to acknowledge that.

[00:53:22] Oh, yeah.

[00:53:23] Oh, yeah.

[00:53:23] I'm a huge believer in it.

[00:53:25] Right.

[00:53:26] Therapy, because they both go collectively.

[00:53:30] God gives the gift.

[00:53:32] Right.

[00:53:32] So we still go.

[00:53:33] We still go to the therapist.

[00:53:35] We still do the things that the exercises and the coping skills that the therapist provides.

[00:53:42] Now, the thing for me that was a blessing, my therapist was also a believer.

[00:53:45] So she would intertwine the word of God with the strategies that she provided.

[00:53:52] So it was really bringing the two in.

[00:53:56] And that's the key.

[00:53:57] As a believer, find a therapist who is a blood-bought believer who will give you the skills according to the word of God to help you with whatever it is that you're going through.

[00:54:08] Yeah.

[00:54:09] And so what I love about that is that connection, you got what you pray for, number one.

[00:54:13] And number two, like that connection, it's different kinds of therapy.

[00:54:18] And so for those who want a scripture-based therapist, they exist.

[00:54:24] For those who want EMDR or talk therapy, there's so many.

[00:54:28] And so there's like this plethora of options to seek that help that we need.

[00:54:33] And I am so pro-therapy.

[00:54:35] I don't think I ever did an episode without mentioning therapy.

[00:54:38] So thank you for doing it on my behalf.

[00:54:40] I appreciate that.

[00:54:41] You're welcome.

[00:54:43] So we have gone through all of the questions.

[00:54:46] I want to give you time to share anything that I did not ask or anything that you want to cover before we end the episode.

[00:54:58] End with this.

[00:54:59] We shared a lot of content, both myself and Nikita.

[00:55:03] We shared some strategies.

[00:55:04] We shared some words of wisdom.

[00:55:06] And one thing that I always say, and I've observed, and I used to be that person, I would go to events, listening, and grab all of this content only to leave and not implement anything that I heard.

[00:55:19] So in simplicity, because that's the type of coach that I am, I want you to identify one thing, one takeaway that resonated with your spirit that you can go out and actually do.

[00:55:33] Because there's no point in gathering all of this amazing content if you're not going to go out and at least do the very thing that you learned.

[00:55:42] We're not going to overcomplicate it.

[00:55:44] Take one thing.

[00:55:45] Now, if you're that person who got to have a list, make a list of three things and circle the one.

[00:55:51] Once you've mastered the one, come back and master the other two.

[00:55:55] But I want you to go out and implement.

[00:55:58] This is your life.

[00:55:59] And the only way it's going to change, again, is if you take the reins and you use your might, your strength, and the ability and the power to go out and do something better.

[00:56:11] I love that.

[00:56:11] That is an absolute perfect way to end the episode.

[00:56:14] Thank you so much for watching, Resilient.

[00:56:16] I hope this episode gave you some tools to connect with and increase your resiliency.

[00:56:22] I'm proud of you.

[00:56:24] Let's keep up the momentum.

[00:56:25] Follow Resilient Life on your favorite podcast platform and on YouTube at Resilient Life Podcast.

[00:56:32] Until next time, be kind to yourself and others.